Only 5 years ago I was in transport and this was my creation "the punisher" .I was partying, a topless waiter & kickboxer. I had been working around the underworld for 12 years, dating a stripper. A life of harleys, raceboats fast cars and stuck in the external material fast lane of delusions. Spiritually dead inside. Huge bills and stress, constantly buying things to fill in the never ending un happiness, that lack of self love and connection which the collective is feeling across the earth.
Alcohol and big benders was my only escape from this reality, I loved being able to talk deeply with my crew who i partied with when we were 14 beers deep at 5am in some seedy pub watching the sun rise with red eyes, no filter but a real connection to my boys, alcohol was the tool which used to bond us guys.
No one ever had a addiction to substance it was about lack of connection we were lost, lonely and wanted to fit in. I realized that i didnt need drugs or alcohol early on to connect deeply when i started meditation and ceremony work this connection to self and all things only solidified and amplified. After i sold my truck i had chronic fatigue and it took me a year of doing nothing to even feel remotely human again.
I really feel for the greater population who are in this mind set now needing "tools" to dig deep , like these obsessive body builders who spend their lives in the gym, what for? To be internally & mentally unhealthy to look a certian way. Use that muscle to fucking fight the system enslaving us not to parade around in your singlets, we are under attack from evil and people waste their lives looking in a mirror, or taking drunk selfies in a club toilet. Its madness..
Such a waste of life. Humans are running programs of lack & having to fit into this material fame, false pride & glama, reality of ego stroking fake conversations with hidden agendas people pretending to be happy. Putting photos on fb & insta of the best 2 mins of the month when they are unhappy to the core feeling the worldly collective pain. The truth of the matter is we have everything we need already inside, you just need to tap into the heart space be honest and true to yourself.
There is definitely a lack of mentors on earth. I grew up with Rap culture, gangsters, lebos in done up honda civics, surfers, fast food and reality tv. I can only imagine how my life would have been different if i had elders, shamans, or just inspiring people I respected teaching me how to be a man, there is no rights of passage in the western world a real lack of sacredness
Im sure i would have avioded some seriously hard, shit lessons and life threatening situations which were un necessary. It only created trauma in my body im releasing now. Through occult practises.
Its interesting how we can have a full rebirth every few years. Im seeing people coming back full circle to the person they were when young. The true core essence of themselves. Did most of us take a huge detour from our lifes purpose, due to cultural & social programming? I feel like im starting all over again, walking my truth being exact with my words and intentions.
Forget everything be that crazy weird person thats inside you waiting to get out. The last thing you want is to grow old with regrets..
Stop trying to be someone else. Fitting in is a mind virus. Who are you really?